This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
