this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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