he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
