Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize
