I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
