the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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