hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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