all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
