Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
