I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
