i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
