please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize