Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
