Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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