Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
