she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
