so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just googled if crying burns calories
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
