I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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