She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize