i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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