You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
