i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
