Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize