Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
