The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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