ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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