SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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