shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
