So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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