I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
