coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
