so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
