Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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