epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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