clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
