So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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