your room smells of hookers.
And success
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
