your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
