she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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