The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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