So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize