how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
