drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
