nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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