hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
