he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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