your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
