dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
