So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
