he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
