I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
