My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
