Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
